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8/18/2018 0 Comments Try Something New “How do you know it’s impossible, if you don’t try?”
Sometimes we get really stuck in the same box, the same comfort zone for a long time. The habits we've created have grown and matured. It's important to keep learning new skills. You can start by watching tutorials on YouTube, taking classes, or just trying it without help. Stop being afraid to take a different track than the one you go on every single day.
You may think, "I'm good here." No! Do not get comfortable, because life will hit you with a flaming fast ball out of nowhere. I encourage you, yes YOU to try something new and discover another fun thing. The world is too vast to stay in a four by four. Continue to expand, even by little measures. Maybe one day someone will need help decorating their living room and because you've been watching interior design videos on YouTube, you have insight (maybe). Say your friend is having a party and wants to bake a really cool cake, but doesn't know how. Thankfully, you've been taking baking classes and can help her. These examples sound far-fetched, but I hope the message still got through. I'm not saying do it for others, you could be in those predicaments. Doing something you haven't done brings a new kind of excitement because it's not what you're used to. So please try something new and encourage others to do so as well! *Photo by Patrick Boucher on Unsplash
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3/3/2018 0 Comments Time is an IllusionDoes it pass, does it cry? Does it sigh when it loses sunlight? We want more when there’s less, and less when there’s more. It gives us context and deadlines. Milestones and headstones. We can waste it or spend it wisely.
But it doesn’t exist. Time is not real. Humans created time to document the rays of sunshine. To categorize wake and sleep. Time is an illusion. You cannot run out of something that doesn’t exist. We have built a world around time and now it has authority over our lives. We will never have enough time to do something. It is never enough time to have fun. Each day comes and goes in the blink of an eye, next thing you know it’s 2025. So what’s the solution? Time management they say. But we don’t control the Earth’s tilt or rotation. We cannot bend it to our will and stop it on command. It goes on with or without us in orbit. Everyday is the same. We are living in the past, present, and future at the same time. There are no breaks between. There’s no yesterday or next week. We are floating in space latching on to meaningless words and numbers that elude us. Remember this the next time you wish the hours could go by faster. *Photos by Andrik Langfield and Ashley Bean on Unsplash.com **Edited by me 2/3/2018 0 Comments BiasIn my sociology class, we are going over classical theory and the "founders" of sociology. Each thinker has formed their definition of society, interactions, and how to study it. One person in particular is Auguste Comte who lived during the time of the French Revolution. Don't worry, this isn't a history lesson. I am going to talk about bias and conflicting beliefs between people and how they work together to shape society, not break it. In Comte's view, society was in need of order and progress. Again, he lived during the French Revolution and saw this event as chaotic without understanding the implications of the revolution. People did not protest, yell and fight, because of boredom. They wanted change. Sometimes with change comes conflict because of those differing beliefs everyone has about authority, the economy, or human rights. Comte didn't take into account the benefit or function of other ideas and groups he saw as inferior. His narrow-minded view of a future society also did not account for conflict or the role they play in a society. He foresaw humans as living in harmony in a deterministic world where humans are rational and make the "right" decisions. He fails to realize how other beliefs function in and create society. He claimed the French revolution was chaotic, but doesn't address the reasoning. In fact, contrary to his thinking, there was order and progress within that movement. Comte also refused to read other thinker's writings because he thought they would taint his view. It's important to stay open-minded and embrace difference of ideas. Analyzing situations from another point of view gives you insight. Fills in the gaps even. You can agree to disagree and hold on to your opinions, but don't invalidate others. Don't allow bias to cloud your judgment. Consider everyone's truths. Realize there are so many different lives that are being lived which means billions of different experiences. How can your one view of the world be the ONLY valid view? It's not possible. Embrace difference. There is nothing wrong with conflicting beliefs. It becomes an issue when people allow those beliefs to clog their ears and not hear others. It's not about getting someone on your side. It's about respecting each other's differences. That's how society works!
*1st photo by Kyle Glenn and 2nd photo by Ethan Weil on Unsplash.com Reference: Ritzer, George, and Jeffrey Stepnisky. Classical Sociological Theory. SAGE, 2018. 12/30/2017 0 Comments Wise Words from a Homeless ManA couple months ago I was standing at the bus stop with several other people, some of them college students. There was also a homeless man sitting on the ground to my right. I just finished grocery shopping and had the bag resting my feet. My ear buds were in, so I couldn’t hear much of what the man was saying. I took them out assuming he was asking me a question, but he wasn’t. The man was giving us advice and warning us about not focusing on our academics. He told us when he was in school, all he did was party and run around with his friends instead of taking school seriously. He said if we didn’t focus and do our best, we could end up like him and we didn’t want that type of life. I’m not sure if the other students were paying attention or taking his advice seriously, but I was. That man made a great point. Sometimes we take our situations for granted without realizing how quickly it can turn for the worse. I was humbled by his words. There was something special in his speech. He wasn’t scolding us, he didn’t have to say anything to us. He felt compelled to share his story so we wouldn’t make the same mistakes. Little things like this mean so much. Hen you’re in school there is obviously a goal in mind, but so many distractions in the way. So much stress in the way. He was not implying that the road was easy, but that we should try. Don’t get discouraged and quit. Don’t get distracted and get off track like the man said. *Individual photos by Jose Murillo and Vladislav Klapin on Unsplash.com, edited by me 12/23/2017 0 Comments How to Spend your "Free Time"School’s out! I’ve been on break for about a week now and let me say it has been wonderful. This quarter was extremely hectic. So, what now? It’s time to get back to writing. I can focus on more exciting things like writing and my blog. It sounds counterintuitive to give myself work during break, but this is fun. I get to do what I love after spending four months focusing on academics and work. Turn “free time” into personal work time. Never been to Miami? Always wanted to learn how to draw? Need to work on your LinkedIn profile? Want to learn a new recipe? These ideas can become goals. Put away ten dollars every paycheck for Miami. Take a couple minutes each day to watch short drawing videos on YouTube. Watch a LinkedIn tutorial online. Buy a cookbook or ask a family member for recipe ideas. Some of these will take a couple minutes, hours, or days to accomplish. Others might take longer. This doesn’t mean you can’t relax. I wrote a post about removing yourself from your workload in October. The crucial message I’m trying to convey is use your spare time to improve components of your life. It doesn’t always have to be about “work”. Play a new board game with your family, go to a concert, take a walk, or attend an art show. Take advantage of the world around you and your resources. Don’t live the same boring or unfulfilling life. Make decorations for your home. Organize your kitchen. Sell your jewelry! Try a new hairstyle. Even if you have five minutes, there is something you can do or learn in that time. Continue to grow, continue to gain more knowledge, continue to succeed in life. People complain about not having enough time to do fun things, but don’t realize they could utilize their short periods of free time. Save an episode of your favorite show for tomorrow and do something exciting. Stop living comfortably and challenge your mind. *Photo by Loic Djim on Unsplash 10/21/2017 0 Comments It's Okay to Take a BreakSometimes the weights on our shoulders get too heavy to carry around. We add so much on our plate that we forget to care for ourselves. We are expected to run like machines, but we are not made of metal, bolts and wires. No. We have a brain that tells us when the stress is too much, and a heart that won’t beat forever. We are not machines, we are human and as humans, we need to slow down sometimes. The world will continue to spin and go one whether you are working or sleeping. Time is an illusion. We don’t lose or gain time. We simply live within its man-made constraints. What we do with that illusion still matters. Not everyone can slow down unfortunately. Some people work three or four jobs to keep up. Some may only work one but have other obligations such as their family. Even in those times, leaving a smidgen of space for self-care can be beneficial in the long run. In my sociology class we are learning about labor movements in the 20th century. It’s crazy to believe people worked more than eight-hour work days and never got a break and were not allowed to speak to one another. These men, women, and children, worked around and with dangerous machines and chemicals, but weren’t allowed basic rights like using the bathroom. How can you expect your workforce to thrive with such horrid conditions? How can one expect to do their best job in those environments? As a rule, I make sure there is room in my schedule for alone time. I need that space to relax by myself. Sometimes I push homework to the next day or later in the night just so I can take a much-needed nap. It’s important to take a break from the world and take care of yourself. Our bodies need time to rejuvenate and get ready for the next battle. Hanging out with friends, taking a walk by yourself, reading a magazine, or going to a play are all ways to do that. Taking care of your mind and body is not a selfish deed. It is necessary and healthy. Allow your human body to breathe. How can you expect to be your best if you can’t even stay awake? *Photos from freephotos.cc 10/14/2017 0 Comments Vision BoardsI’m sure most, if not all of you, have heard of a vision board where you put up quotes or pictures of what you envision your future to be. I thought about doing that, but then realized it wasn’t what I wanted. Instead I created art boards and cut out magazine pictures that looked aesthetically pleasing or had some sort of meaning to it. This is a project everyone should do. Not the same exact thing I did, but the idea. It allows you to become more introspective. You’ll start to ask, “Why do I like this picture and not that?” “What type of meaning does this have for me?” Let your creative side come out in whatever you do. Don't just think outside the box, live outside the box. Change things the way you want to, like how I did with the vision boards. Take snippets of ideas from various places and create something personal to YOU. Allow the art to represent your vision and your ideals. When the creative juices flow in, it will express your inner beauty as well. Each of my boards has a theme. The first one is black white, the second is blue, the third is brown, and the fourth is colorful. My boards may not make sense to others, but I look at them and see the connections. They all complement each other. Each board tells a story through the pictures. I have a picture of Issa Rae, the creator of Insecure. I started watching webisodes on her YouTube channel and was excited when she landed a show on HBO. That right there is inspiring. I have photo of fashion models like Bella Hadid, because I’ve grown to appreciate modeling and photography more thanks to my novel, Being a Model. All the research I did caused me to see the artistry in modeling in a way I never saw before. I also have a photo of black ballerinas and I love that picture because there you don’t see that type of representation often. Finally, I have my “Me” board. This will have bible verses, words from magazines, my unofficial book covers, and things that I like/ like to do. The way I express myself is through writing and speaking. This time I wanted something visual and hands-on to do. Next, I might paint or spray paint something. This year, my creative brain has taken off and I want to try everything! Inspiration is everywhere. You need to pay attention and grab it. 10/7/2017 2 Comments Losing hope and motivation There are times when we question ourselves and what we’re doing. Is this the right major? Is this the right career field? Should I move to a new state? In the beginning of the race we run high on adrenaline, but it dies out in the middle, until we come to a slow crawl towards the end. We lose the momentum that pushed us forward. We begin to doubt our abilities and our dreams, allowing them to wither away and fade into oblivion. We forget why. Once things get difficult or take the “wrong” turn, we say, “what’s the point of this?” “I’m tired of waking up early for this class/ job I don’t like.” “I should just take the easier route.” “No one believes in me.” Say no to these negative thoughts. Remember why you started this journey. Remember the goal. See the finish line in your future. Pick up your feet and start running again. The problem may be your routines or habits. Try changing things up a bit. Find a new place to study. Try taking a different route to work or school. Re-vamp your project, start over if need be. Do something to bring that spark back. Do not give up on yourself. Have milestones along the way so you know progress is being made. Losing hope and motivation is a part of the journey. It wasn’t easy writing my books. Some days I wonder what the point is for spending hours and mental energy on something that may never get shelf life. “Who’s going to read my blog anyways?” “Are my stories intriguing enough?” Stomping on those thoughts, I continue to write. I joined Camp Nanowrimo, set a weekly schedule for each book, and set deadlines.
If it helps to speak to someone else and vent, reach out to a close friend or a mentor. Prayer and/or meditation is also a terrific way to put your mindset back in place. Maybe you need a break to let loose or think. Take a day off or a couple (this might not work for school, please don’t skip your classes). For October, I am not working on any books, just blogging and setting up for Nanowrimo in November. I’m trying to write 50,000 words in thirty days (yikes!). That may or may not happen, BUT the most I’ve ever written for Nano is 20-something thousand. If I even make it to thirty thousand, that will be an incredible accomplishment. This is what I mean. Fifty is the goal, but 30 would still be better than the last time. You need to do better than your last accomplishment. Didn’t get an A+ in class, but got a better score on this test than the last? That’s something to celebrate. Passed a deadline for a personal project, but still completed it? That’s an achievement! Effort is what counts. Do what you need to do to get back into the race and run at maximum speed. Next week’s topic is on Vision Boards. 9/23/2017 0 Comments New School Year
Many students went back to school about a month ago. I start this upcoming Thursday. This is my junior year in college, which means the end is almost here! I have so many goals to accomplish this year, so many unnecessary things/people to let go of this year, and I’m excited to start. Everyone has the giddy feeling at the beginning of school. We’re ready for any challenge that comes their way, but by the third (or first!) week of school, our brains have melted. They say think big so we do, but then we realize how complex it is to create a reality out of our big thoughts. It’s a tad bit impractical. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying a person can’t do that. If you read my post last week about prioritizing your time, you know I don’t think that. The problem arises when the road to creating something real becomes more difficult than we expected. We almost expect it to materialize before us. Society gives the perception that this is straightforward and simple when it’s not. It’s easy to say, “I’m going to get straight A’s this year!” It’s a lot more difficult to achieve that. It takes hours of dedication and preparation and you still might not get all A’s. Tailor your goals to your life and your own experiences. Take your ideas as far as you want, but remember to take the right road on the journey to achieving your goals. 9/16/2017 0 Comments Validating YourselfNever allow someone to tell you that you can’t get something done. Have confidence in your abilities. There are so many brilliant minds suppressed by people who don’t believe in them or are plain jealous. I experienced this before in middle school. My friend and I wanted to set-up a dance event for students and teachers. I don’t remember what is was for. We confided in a friend and told her our idea. You know what she told us? She said it wasn’t a good idea and we shouldn’t do it. My friend and I glanced at each other shocked. This girl didn’t give us an alternative or try to help. She simply shut us down. I then said, “Well, we’re still going to try and do it.” Unfortunately, the plan failed and we couldn’t do our program. Oh well, the effort was what mattered. How could we know if we never tried? Don’t stop something because someone says you can’t do it (unless they give you detailed reasons). Work hard for what you want. Sometimes you still fail. Maybe it wasn’t the niche for you, but that okay because it means there is something else. They try to make your ideas or aspirations seem unreachable or dumb. Even if you don't have that skill, practice to do better. Remember the purpose of your actions. Remember your abilities and skills. You are capable. It hurts when your “support system” doesn’t support your vision, but those people will end up asking for your advice when the success pours in. Once you check off your goals, those things won’t matter because you will see how capable you are. Your competency is evident. We have the capacity to fail and succeed. The encouragement of others is nice, but it’s easy to depend on it. Don’t rely on them to push you forward. Row your own boat. Fly your own plane. Cook your own food. Confirm the person in the mirror. If you want it, go for it. The journey is yours. |
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