That’s what I am, what I’ve become
Oh how long have I been confused?
My thoughts heavy, my heart just numb
There’s nothing worse than being bruised
Left out in the cold, nowhere to go
I thought you cared, I thought I mattered
Well now I know
Now I’m crestfallen and tattered.
It's dark and scary out here
With strangers walking around
They kick me aside and sneer
For days I've been waiting to be found
People say that dolls aren’t real
That we have no thoughts or heart
You thought that I couldn't feel
And now we’re torn apart.
Where were you when I called out?
Nowhere to be found that’s where
How disgraced I feel, all washed out
It’s a horrible feeling aren’t you aware!
How did this become?
When did it begin?
I thought I always saved you from being glum
Your favorite because I always made you grin.
You said you loved me
But I guess you lied
Does my pain give you glee?
I wonder does my happiness make you cry.
Amy said she’d never leave me
But she grew older and did just that.
She was going to college you see,
With that hideous boy Matt.
Long story short,
She threw me out like a wart.
That’s what I am, and what I always will be.
Dear future self,
I hope you’re happy
Living the luxury of life you want.
May your smiles be broader,
And your eyes brighter.
I hope you found help
For all the bad experiences that tormented you
May your days be filled with joy,
And your voice rasped with laughter
I hope you have your dream job
Saving lives even though you could barely save your own.
May your heart be whole,
And your ears happy to listen
I hope your knight in shining armor rescued you
From all those terrible voices in your head.
May your thoughts be kind,
And your conscience clear.
I hope your world is at peace
From the better decisions you might have made.
May your steps be lighter
And your days longer.