Dear future self,
I hope you’re happy
Living the luxury of life you want.
May your smiles be broader,
And your eyes brighter.
I hope you found help
For all the bad experiences that tormented you
May your days be filled with joy,
And your voice rasped with laughter
I hope you have your dream job
Saving lives even though you could barely save your own.
May your heart be whole,
And your ears happy to listen
I hope your knight in shining armor rescued you
From all those terrible voices in your head.
May your thoughts be kind,
And your conscience clear.
I hope your world is at peace
From the better decisions you might have made.
May your steps be lighter
And your days longer.
We always ask why, but never search for the answers because we’re scared of the truth hitting us. Losing our pride and demeaning our ego.
We try so hard to make x+z equal something when we know it never will. You can’t get to z from x without passing through y.
I thought everything was okay until I saw you. My world shattered. The fumes tumbled out my mouth like acid reflux, spilling over my lips. I cried from the inside and tried to crawl over the spikes glinting towards my helpless self. I can’t hide when I want to. I have to be seen by all.
Don’t allow your face to betray you. Don’t show emotions.
Weakness is only an inch away. Flakes flicker light as your irises twist and stretch. In and out they pull, dragging, luring me into the dark abyss. A trap waits in the glorious dungeon of pupils staring into my own wide ones. What I want to see is not reflected in what is before me. A disgusting lump of fiction clothed in desire, truth, and satisfaction.
Bruised from the left common carotid to the apex from the sharp blows of your fantasy. They left purple patches as a reminder to never look through a cracked mirror.
Anos and Non always sat in the front a seat empty between them. Non had a girlfriend, but Anos, might have been single. They seemed perfect for each other. Strangers, but companions in a sense. They held the royal court in CRWT 045. No one knew it but me, the creep two rows behind. Spikes and tattoos, a shave to the side and a shave to the back, they complimented each other in a way only my twisted mind could see. There was a loss, but there was also something to gain. If only they could feel what I see, a delicious mesh of two seemingly perfect people to make one. Anos and Non. Non and Anos.
Tears are just salty, bitter pieces of mockery. They laugh and scorn you for weakness. They squeeze themselves out of you, creating a pounding of drums reverberating through the skull. They create the pulsing redness covering the whiteness of eyes. After they dry, marks of their footsteps pattern the cheeks. Tears leave you juiced and tired and helpless, useless, pained! Curse the tears that fall from love. They’re all lies and mockery bundled into salty wetness running down your face.
I wish they were gone. No ducts of tears at the sides of my eyes, no witness to failure.
Chauffeur breaks, talisman goods on a plate. Silver streaks of your memoir, the silkiness of luck. Where is danger in your eyes? The gleaming star of ferocity? The sun that shines in your irises as bright as can be. Licks of alcohol and a pinch of salt was all it took to bring you down, down the tunnel. The hole that twisted the frail ankle of you. Void. Darkness ensued, but only for a moment of silence it grew with determination to grow and be true! Oh how dreams of infatuation could flatter me so. Petals of sighs in the wind to your every breath. The death of an old beginning. The memoir that brought you back to life, a book filled with true lies of your world. How sick do you think we are, for your death to belittle me? How intricate the threads of deceit sown beautifully in the eye of the beholder. Luck has no meaning. Luck is as good as that duck about to get killed by a ruthless hunter with nothing but stupidity and a great aim going on for him. SQUAT, BAM! “There’s a great hit!” The old idiot said. Just like you. The memoir was the hunter as I, and many others, but more importantly, I was the duck. Your true lies seared the biggest organ on my body, through the woven folds, slipping between the ossified branches, right into my bloody pump.
Challenges in the sky, never ending tragedies on the ground, it’s there.
Scary eclipses in pink and blue cars, where’s the silver lining.
It’s true that things happen for a reason, but it never eases our mind.
I get stuck in the mud, sticky, yucky, alphabetical soup mucky.
The towers always fall, but the bridges never burn quick enough.
Let’s frolic in the grass, feeling it tingle and tickle under our naked feet.
The sun beat beating down on our grinning faces, teeth flashing, and hair dancing in the tornado.
Where are our worries?
Where are our cares?
They’ve flown on to heaven.
As we hold hands and ‘ring around the rosey’ the worries float out our lips into the ears of the Lord.
Why do cry when we can smile?
Everyone loves a giver, loves a helper, hates the bitter, and despises the mean.
They crave delicious chocolate liquid from the sky.
He’s no statue, but can be as stiff as the one staring at us from across the road.
*Ribbit* *Ribbet* haha keep it going.
We can’t let it stop.
The road needs to continue winding down, around the mountain.
Let’s not stop.
There is a place waiting for us.
A chance lurking
Through the scrolls of our minds
We are never done.
Never satisfied with the completed task.
Only yearning for bed bath and beyond.
I got cold
I got burned
The melting and molding, hardening my bones.
I am gone.
You say, “Where are you,”
Find me then.
Kill the dragon guarding my tower.
Rescue me from my prison.
Capture my soul and turn me whole,
Please just don’t leave me here to rock slowly against the cold wall. The slow drumming sounding in my skull gets louder as each day passes away. You say you care, yet here I am still locked and afraid of opening my eyes. It’s the hope that kills me, the burning freezing curdling my blood. Slowly drawing out any sense of self left. A bag of bones and blood is my fate.
You say you love me. Then take my pain away,
revive my dying mind,
carry me to safety
turn your lies into truths into action.
Show me what I’m worth. What’s my price? How much are you willing to pay for a shattered dream?
A tainted meal.
A broken reel.
Something that cannot heal.
Will you come by? Should I expect you soon or will I have to prune in waters so deep it consumes almost all of me. Please, don’t let me drown. I want to be found and fed, caressed and put to bed. A good night’s warm dreamless sleep, counting no sheep, just the way it should be. The way I want it to be. So, will you save me? Fight the dragon to defend me? Climb the tower to claim me? Liberate me from these confines that bind my aching soul. Because Because…
I can’t fight alone anymore, I have no more strength or zeal.
I’m just so tired
What little energy I have left to keep my head bobbing above the water is almost depleted.
Please, please come soon.
I’m not the girl in the mirror
And neither are you.
She is an illusion, put there to scare us.
But we shall not be frightened.
I am mightier than her,
We are mightier than her,
Heck, my dog is mightier!
We are real and she is not
She’s the one with the problem
Such a compulsive liar,
Who’s unable to stop.
So we have to do it.
We have to grasp the truth
And keep it close to our hearts and minds.
Embed it in our soul
And it will never grow old.
The girl in the mirror is not who she seems,
Drifting in and out of view.
Shaping and reshaping into forms anew.
Every blink is a different person
But yet the outside remains the same.
She does this on purpose to drive you insane.
With your sense of mind gone,
You become her surrogate;
Your body will be filled with putrid hate.
Don't let her lies of disdain fool you,
Be confident and hold your head up high.
Because day after day, and lie after lie,
She'll keep trying to break you down.